HOW CAN I HELP MY BOYFRIEND WITH PREMATURE EJACULATION?
If your Boyfriend or Husband struggles with premature ejaculation and you want to know how to help him or how to bring this up, this video is for you.
I'm David, I'm a sex coach, I've been helping guys overcome PE and ED for many years now, and in this video I'll explain:
- Causes of your BFs PE
- AND: things you specifically can do to make him last longer
- at the end: how to bring up the topic without destroying his self-esteem, the typical mistakes
First thing to understand you and your BF are not alone in this...
Thousands of women struggling with their BFs finishing too early, which can ruin the relationship.. So first..
Women on Reddit speaking out about their partner's PE:
Boyfriend literally lasts a few seconds in bed
He ejaculates within 1 min - what can HE do ?
Dealing with husband’s PE for 13 years
Desperate wife (suggesting SSRIs)
Premature ejaculation & inability to stay hard?
My boyfriend suffers from premature ejaculation. How can I help him?
My bfs Premature ejaculation is ruining my connection with him - First 1-2 rounds quick, 3rd 6 min, now even less
How do I (30f) bring up my new bf’s (36m) premature ejaculation problem
Problems:
- not enjoyable sex life
- compensatory stuff like oral, fingering etc. is great, but only as a bonus
- in such situations the girls face these problems:
- not knowing how to bring this up without destroying his self esteem
- not knowing what they can do to help him
- not knowing what is actually possible and what he can do
CAUSES OF YOUR PARTNER's PE
PE can be lifelong or acquired. Causes:
- lifelong PE
- genetics,
- sensitive glans
- hyper arousal, inability to relax
- acquired PE:
- going off antidepressants
- side effect of drugs
- surgery that went wrong
- prostate problems
- etc.
- Main strategy long term: find the cause and remove it. That requires that he recognizes it as a problem. That's why it's very important to open the communication and bring it up without hurting his ego.
- I'll tell you in a minute how you can do that. First let's talk about common mistakes women do in general, when it comes to their partner's PE.
MISTAKES
- thinking that he has mental control over it - he DOESN'T
- thinking he does it because he is egoistic - he isn't
- "why don't you just train to last longer" reddit post
- any negative reaction or feedback
- doing too much penis stimulation during foreplay - BJ / HJ → leave him alone, your main objective is to get yourself wet and ready
THINGS YOU CAN DO BEFORE BRINGING IT UP
- make him cum first and go for round 2
- sex with a mask - men are visual
- buy a desensitizing spray
- have an open communication about it and if he is willing to work on it - let him book a free call with me and we'll take a closer look at your situation and help you have the best sex experience ever.
HOW TO BRING UP PE WITHOUT HURTING HIS SELF ESTEEM
- understand that he's vulnerable and most likely feels guilty and frustrated
- that's why you need to make him understand that you KNOW that it's NOT under his control. You're not judging or blaming it on him.
- But for him to change he must see it as a problem and be ready to work on it. So:
- Nr. 1 objective = get on the same page that it's a problem.
- Nr. 2 = make him understand that he can change it.
- Nr. 3 = go the journey together. Mention that overcoming PE can time and effort from both of you and, may require professional help, and that you're there and supportive
- Here are some conversation starters for PE:
CONVERSATION STARTERS
You can do it after it happens or at any moment where you two are undisturbed .
- Honey, I wanted to ask you about something.. 🙂
- yes?
- I've noticed that you orgasm really quick during sex
- yes...
or
- "Baby, I’ve noticed you seem to get frustrated sometimes after sex. Is it because you worry about finishing quickly ?"
or
- "Honey, can I ask you something about us in bed?"
- "Sure."
- "I noticed that sometimes things end a little faster than expected.
"NO CONTROL" PART
- Do you ever feel like it's something out of your control?"
or
- is it something something you have no control over whatsoever? was it always like this?
- well it's just stress / yeah I know / [whatever]
[if he goes off topic, bring him back and say "Yes, so basically I do NOT any control over it right? I love you baby regardless, I'm just trying to understand ]
- yes, I can't control it
- I see, actually I looked it up online and there are many reasons for this, would you be open to talk about it?
- well, ok
- I think it's important to find the cause for 2 reasons. First - it will enhance our sex life and bring more mutual satisfaction and second - there might be an underlying health problem which needs to be removed. Would you agree?
- yes I guess
- I looked it up and it's either acquired PE, they say it can be diseases, medication etc., or it's a lifelong condition, that can be effectively worked with
- what do you think it is in your case?
→ and go from there.
- Remember - the main goal is to get him to be open and see it as a problem and work on it with your support.
- The easiest you could do is to ask him book a free call with me.
